Friday, February 15, 2013

Nothing Happens When You Do Nothing

There's never going to be a perfect day unless you are a highly wealthy. Money is the root of all evil and having enough of it can make some or all your problems go away. But Karma always comes back to collect on your soul.

I'm going to through a spell of depression because I'm unemployed again.  I'm feeling like a failure sometimes and worthless. Most days I try to block out the negative feelings of being unemployed.  I'm the kinda person that I want what I want when I want it.  However, I am intelligent enough to know that feeling like that its not going to change the way things are.

The majority of us want whatever it is we want when we want it. When we don't get it anger and frustration begin to overwhelm us.  It causes us to not only make irrational decisions, but we hurt the people that we love, push them away, or make them leave altogether. When it gets too tough  start to remember the drive that you once had prior to landing that job. Think about every positive aspect you felt from the beginning to the end of having that position.

As the old saying goes "Heaven helps those who help themselves".  Now with this being said one should remember nothing only happens when you don't apply yourself.  A couple of years ago I would just give up and numb my problems with weed, booze, and food.  These were my only outlets of comfort for my depression for feeling like I wasn't going to get anywhere in my life at the time.  Weed made me happy that I totally forgot that I needed to work.  Having a partner at the time that made it easy for me to live I didn't understand the importance of my independence.  Booze drowned me in sorrow, feeling like I failed and was unworthy.  These counter productive vices only made my situation much worse.  There were things that I wanted to do with myself I couldn't because I was in a situation where my vices and emotions took control.  My last partner encouraged me to be a househusband instead bring my own man.  If anyone feel me say Amen.

Eventually I started to see some type of light in my dark situation.  I started talking to very good friend who not only encouraged me but knew what I was capable of through knowing who I am as person for so long.  She said "Roderick I know you are not this kind of person that sits around on his ass smoking weed and eating all day at the same time drowning in self pity.  You are too good, intelligent, professional, and talented to let it go to waste. Snap out that bullshit and be about the business."

Hearing this from a friend I realized that I had to do something.  So I picked up the phone and called any temp agency I could find on Google and I applied for any job I could find on and  I went on any bogus interview for jobs that I had no experience in.  Even the commission based jobs that I didn't want.  There were days that I still smoked but I started getting contacts for jobs that required I give a urine sample.  So I challenged myself to get my head in the game for real.  I quit smoking weed.  If I was going to be about the business I knew I had to stop.  There were times I wanted to so bad but I knew if I wanted at least some taste of success I had to stop.  Alcohol I had no addiction to but I managed to tame that habit too.  I still drink but its not as bad as when I smoked weed.  Eventually through trail, error, and countless interviews and application submissions I managed to find a job. It was nothing like I wanted but I found a job.  And I was still looking for something else.

What I hope to convey in this post that if anyone is having problems looking for work or feeling like there's no hope just stay focused, claim it, and keep a consistent drive. No none of us is perfect.  No one is up for rejection, but you have to do something to get something. I'd like to thank the love of my life and the person that makes my heart beat, Germon, for always telling me the truth no matter how brutal it is when I get to feeling down. Having a good support system, true friends, and a supportive lover really pushes a person harder and gives much needed motivation to strive harder and go further.

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